It’s the premier of The Page Is Blank’s official ‘Doctor Who’ Podcast, TARDIScast! Join Matt as he reviews the first episode of Torchwood: Miracle Day!
Keep listening, and more will come!
“ What? Close the breach? Stop the Cybermen? Defeat the Daleks? Do you believe I can do that?”
Hello everyone! I can’t tell you how excited I am for the new Starz original series ‘Torchwood: Miracle Day’. I finally received my screener today of the first episode entitled, ‘The New World’.
Coming soon, there will be the first, and very special episode of the all new TARDIScast, a podcast hosted by yours truly that will focus entirely around the world of Doctor Who and it’s spinoffs. We will have a full review SPOILER FREE of the first episode before it airs July 8th on Starz. Once again, I will not reveal spoilers, and I will not be revealing any photos from the show that we do not own the rights for. Click the jump for some details on the upcoming series!
Here’s a list of the episode titles:
1. The New World - 8th July 10:00pm
2. Rendition - 15th July, 10:00pm
3. Dead of Night - 22nd July, 10:00pm
4. Escape to L.A. - 29th July 2011
5. The Categories Of Life - 5th August, 10:00pm
6. The Middle Men - 12th August, 10:00pm
7. Immortal Sins - 19th August 2011, 10:00pm
If you were a fan of the marvelous cult TV hit MYSTERY SCIENCE THEATER 3000 then I’m sure you already know about Rifftrax.com. Rifftrax is the cast of MST3K doing what they do best… riffing awful movies and making them amazing! They’re newest outing is one that Chris and I have discussed negatively many times on the podcast… ‘X-Men: The Last Stand’. Head over to Rifftrax.com and get ready to laugh!
I just got back, literally seconds ago from seeing the new Warner Bros. superhero epic, ‘Green Lantern’. Arguably the most controversial of Warner’s hero outings so far, ‘Green Lantern’ had potential to be good, maybe even stellar, but at least it should have been watchable. Not so.
The film stars Ryan Reynolds as the cocky wiseass Hal Jordan, a test pilot with an extreme disregard for the rules. While Maverick – OH! sorry, HAL is off gallivanting with his theatrics, a threat brews amongst the stars in the form of Paralax, an evil being created from the dark yellow energy of Fear. The only thing that can stop it is the Green Lantern Corps, an organization of intergalactic super-cops that harness the green energy of Will, turning their imaginations into reality. Unfortunately, Paralax is too powerful and defeats the Corps finest warrior, Abin Sur (Temura Morrison). Now Abin Sur’s power ring has chosen a human, Hal, to be his successor and banish Paralax from our galaxy!
Sounds good right? Don’t be fooled. While this film does have a few moments of great action and quality entertainment, it ultimately fails to measure up to even the most basic of movie standards.
The first thing a film needs is a script. This film didn’t have that. Well, maybe it did. Sorry I was too busy slapping my palm to my forehead in disbelief at some of the dialogue that I might have gone unconscious at some point.
Next you need actors. Again, this movie didn’t have that. Instead it had statistics. It seems as though the studio heads sat around a room and asked analysts to find out who is popular in Hollywood. Ryan Reynolds and Blake goddamn Lively. Next, we need to draw in the independent/artsy crowd – Peter Sarsgaard. Next we need respectable actors to sell the fact that we’re completely serious about this movie, Tim Robbins! And finally, a few actors that might actually be good at the role we put them in, Mark Strong!
This is the most mish-mashed, hodge-podge cast to ever hit the screen. At least Harrison Ford and Shia LeBeoff had some tolerable screen chemistry. NO ONE IN THIS FILM HAS ANY CHEMISTRY EVER!!
Next up. This film cost over $300 million. I’ll let that settle in. WHERE DID THIS MONEY GO???? Clearly it went to everyone’s paycheck’s because it’s no where to be seen on the screen here. Two months ago, I commented on an article that WB was investing another $9 million in the effects of this film. Well, the suit looked better… but the rest of the film is a joke! I mean… really? what was with the fight scene between Hal and Hector Hammond? Really?
I can’t really go into too many other details with divulging spoilers. But let me say this.
Don’t see this movie. Don’t reward a movie studio for halfassed filmmaking. Let them know that we as an audience are not going to stand for it. Let them know that quality storytelling,not budget and not effects, always comes first.
3 power rings out of 10
I certainly hope so. We’ve all noticed that since AVATAR was a massive hit worldwide at the box office, there’s been a slew of 3D films being cranked out of Hollywood every weekend. But is this rise in 3D beginning to cause its own downfall? According to BTIG analyst Richard Greenfield, the answer is yes.
According to Mr. Greenfield, sales for 3D are dwindling faster than audiences expectations for another Pirates film. Fandango estimates have come in for ‘Green Lantern’ and ‘Harry Potter’ and it is not good. Not only is GL trending far below studio expectations, but it’s ticket sales have been primarily 2D based. Not only that! But so is the other Warner Bros summer slugger Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows pt. 2.
According to the report, sales for 3D on both films have been significantly (and if you’re a studio head, frighteningly) lower than 2D, but why!? Greenfield explains, “We continue to believe U.S. consumers are frustrated with the amount of 3D movies Hollywood is producing, especially when combined with excessive ticket prices,” Thank you, someone said it! Why see a 3D flick for almost $20 when you could see a brighter and more vivid looking film for half the price!?
Anyone in Hall H last year at Comic Con remembers the silent but present hisses at any mention of 3D by studio heads and presenters. The most noteworthy 3D mention actually came during the panel for Scott Pilgrim in which Edgar Wright was quoted as saying, “- and it will be released in amazing 2D!” After an earth-shattering cheer from the audience, Wright went on record by saying has nothing against 3D. But we all know that fans do.
With the 3D backlash continuing, we saw earlier this week that even the Star Wars 3D outing is going to be cut down to a wait and see status.
Could this really be the end of 3D in cinema? Could audiences tolerance and patience finally win out and prove to James Cameron that it is NOT in fact a way of the future, but still a wonky theme park style attraction? I think I speak for most of us at the Page Is Blank by saying, GOD I HOPE SO!
For more, check out THR
Join Matt and special guest Breana Bowers live from the Hollywood Bowl for STAR WARS in Concert! And stay tuned till the end for a special appearance from a very special guest!
1989 saw the release of one of the most beloved Disney classics, ‘The Little Mermaid’. The film is a gorgeous portrayal of teenage angst, desire, and ultimately everlasting love. It’s a film that accomplished what few films ever could, deliver a female teenage character that doesn’t piss us off, (I’m talking to you Twilight series). Twenty two years after the original release of the film, Walt Disney Imagineering has brought Ariel’s story to the people with ‘The Little Mermaid: Ariel’s Undersea Adventure’, a new storybook style ride in similar execution to the classic Fantasyland rides of Disneyland. Yesterday, I had an opportunity to check the ride out for myself.
Beware, spoilers ahead. I will be talking about the finer details, so if you’d rather be unspoiled, just check the ride out for yourself at Disney’s California Adventure starting tomorrow June 3.
I’m a huge fan of the original film, ‘The Little Mermaid’… not something every twenty-four year old man is willing to admit. It’s a great story filled with excitement, adventure, betrayal, heart break, sacrafice, and ultimately love. When I heard they were making a ride at DCA to be a storybook version of the film, I got incredibly excited. Over the past few months, Chris and I have been monitoring the progress of the rides construction. From design concepts, to set construction, to animatronic programming, we were astonished by just how detailed and beautiful this ride was turning out to be.
Needless to say, I was surprised and delighted to see a MASSIVE line outside the ride yesterday for Annual Passholder Previews. My friend Molly and I waited in line for about thirty or forty minutes admiring the seashells in the cement that floored our line queue. We also pointed out a few hidden Mickeys to keep ourselves entertained. Once we got inside the new building, we were greeted by a giant mural that featured most of the major Little Mermaid characters. It was a really well lit, and very well constructed mural that harkened back to the loading areas of other Disney storybook rides. Awesome.
We hopped aboard our clamshell and our ride began. The ride is essentially told to you by Scuttle, Ariel’s misnomering seagull friend. As we were beautifully transported to our undersea environment, we round a corner and are face to face with a beautiful Ariel. Her hair moves, her eyes blink, she bobs and sways with the tide and the music. Truly beautiful.
Then things take a down hill. When we round the next corner, we go into what’s supposed to be the highlight of the ride, Under The Sea, the films signature song. The room is very vibrant and very beautiful… but as you might have seen in the video… it seems very empty. There’s a lot of movement from some very basic looking animatronic characters. The fish sway, and the starfish spin, but other than that, there’s no real movement. The room feels very bland and lifeless. To be fair, there’s room for improvement. Perhaps some bubble machines and some new characters in the rafters, that would be nice. They need to put in some extra movement in the sea plants too. There seems to be lots of room for improvement in just the plant life. If they can make Ariel’s hair flow with the tide, they can make a plastic plant sway. These little things would definitely spruce this ride up.
The next area is Ursella’s den. The lead up is interesting. The actual den is… well… pitch black with an Ursella character singing around a cauldron. Ursella looks amazing… but… where’s the den itself? There’s not really much to it. Moving on.
We see a CGI Ariel losing her fins and receiving legs followed by the ‘Kiss The Girl’ moment… with fish spouting plastic water…. PLASTIC WATER!? This is the Little Mermaid ride! Where is the water! This angered me to no end. It definitely feels like this was a temporary solution to a deadline they almost couldn’t reach. But seriously… plastic water.
Then we come to the finale… no battle, no conflict. We see a silhouette of Ariel and Erik kissing. ANd low and behold, Ariel gets her voice back. Ursella can be seen cursing them young kids in the background. Our next segment is the ending with all the characters… and its over…
Yeah, no battle, no conflict, no closure. Just a simple tie of knot to end it… I guess it harkens back to some of the other rides in fantasyland… but this felt incomplete.
Just to be clear. I did not hate this ride. I liked it, but there is so much opportunity to improve this ride that I can’t recommend it for the insane wait times guests will experience this weekend.
6 shells out of 10.
One would think that with the plethora of superhero films hitting the cineplex these days, audiences would get weary and bored of seeing the same old formula over and over again. This summer however holds a superhero roster unlike any other. We’ve done the classics, Superman, Spider-Man, X-Men, Batman, etc. Who’s left but the secondary peripheral characters… ones that main stream audiences probably don’t know or care about.
Luckily, Marvel Studios has found away to bring these wonderful characters to life in a way that appeals not just to their faithful fans, but also mainstream audiences that would never have thought twice about such characters. With Marvels intended super-mash-up next summer, ‘The Avengers’ we knew that Marvel would have to address it’s most controversial character among said super team, Thor.
The movie is fantastic! I was really blown away by how enjoyable this film really was. This film was the pivotal point in the Marvel-verse in which audiences would have to buy in that this world that was built up as being based on some sort of realistic reality may also harbor an element of mysticism. In other words, magic. Luckily, Kenneth Branagh’s, ‘Thor’ not only achieves this universal leap but also thrills and entertains on a level that exceeds the first two ‘Iron Man’ films.
The film stars Chris Hemmsworth as Thor the Norse God of Thunder, Anthony Hopkins as his father Odin, Tom Hiddleston as his mischievous brother Loki, and Natalie Portman as his Earth bound love interest Jane Foster. The cast is great and they all look like they’re having a great time in this big budget blockbuster.
It’s a task to find something negative about the film, but my one bit of criticism really lies with the editing. It was way too quick. The cuts were so rapid that it felt like machine gun fire on my face. In baseball, when a batter swings, he doesn’t just stop the bat at the point of impact. He swings all the way around. This is called a follow-through. Similar qualities normally apply to editing. You have a dramatic situation in which something is revealed (when the bat hits the ball), then you have a moment in which the camera lingers on the characters expression for a few moments to sell just how the transpired events are affecting them (the follow-through). ‘Thor’ has zero follow-through. There were so many moments that I wanted to explore and really get into the character’s head with, but I couldn’t. Normally, something like this could be the death of a film. But thankfully, ‘Thor’ features so many wonderfully executed characters, fight scenes and visual effects that my qualms are laid to rest and replaced by cheers!
One thing that I really want to point out is the beautiful cinematography. There was a lot of dutched and tilted angles similar to the recent runs of the Thor comic series. Every frame of this film feels authentic and ripped from the source material, it really is a beautiful film to watch.
The visual effects were breath taking. The concept of Asgard could have easily gone horribly wrong. A giant golden city with a rainbow bridge to other worlds… and they not only managed to make it work, but they managed to make it incredibly gorgeous to behold! One sequence pits Thor and his companions against the monstrous Frost Giants in another realm in the universe. This realm was essentially Moria in ice and it is stunning! Not once in this film was I pulled out for an effect. Everything looked great and I was eating it all up.
Now I intend on seeing this film again in 3D, I saw it in 2D due to the upconversion rumors. But I will be back with an update on how well the 3D plays.
In summation, despite it’s flaws, ‘Thor’ manages to work its way into the Marvel-verse with more gusto and power than any of it’s superhero predecessors.
Zack Snyder has been called many things even ‘Hollywood’s Golden Boy’ and ‘Geek God’. After observing his film ‘Sucker Punch’, these terms can no longer describe this man.
So as we’ve seen from the many reviews online, and from Chris’ many posts, ‘Sucker Punch’ is a horrible movie. I had the unfortunate idea of seeing the film this evening and within five minutes I was regretting this decision.
Be warned, what follows is very spoiler heavy. Take the Leap!
I’ll start this review by stating the obvious. It would not be enough to say that I hate this movie. I don’t believe there is a word in the english language that could accurately describe the amount of shame, anguish and embarrassment felt after leaving this screening.
The film stars a cast of relative unknowns like Carla Gugino, Emily Browning, Abby Cornish, and Jena Malone. Browning plays Baby Doll, a cute pig tailed girl whose back story is told to you in two variations, although we’re never told which is accurate, and yet we still have no idea who she is or where she comes from. In one variant of the story, she accidentally kills her sister in an attempt to kill her evil stepfather and as a result is thrown into an asylum for the criminally insane. After five days in the asylum, the orderly who is kind of a ring leader mafia type introduces her to the Doctor (John Hamm) to have a lobotomy performed. During the operation, we are thrust into a world where Baby Doll’s story is suddenly a risque stage performance at a brothel in which other girls (ones we saw at the asylum) are the actors. Baby re-enters in a similar fashion only to have her environment different. Other than that, EVERYTHING is exactly the same.
When Baby Doll dances, she enters a dream like state in which she and the other girls become top commandos in the most goofy, nonsensical World of Warcraft battles ever captured on film. After her first dream, she is told by a sense that she will need five items to escape, a map, fire, a knife, a key, and the sheer nerve! She realizes that through her dancing, she can distract the guards of the brothel long enough for the other girls to steal the appropriate swag for their escape. So we have four of these goofy battles that end in betrayal, heartbreak, and death. Big deal.
Ultimately, it doesn’t amount to anything. We never even see one of Baby Doll’s dances! What is so damn mystifying? But perhaps the biggest problem I have with this film is the fact that these fantasy battles are just that: Fantasy. There is nothing at stake in these battles, there are no real world consequences to their actions. In one sequence Vanessa Hudgens’ character almost gets eaten by a giant dragon… so what? there’s nothing at stake for any of them in what essentially makes up three quarters of the movie. Where is the conflict? Where is the story? Why do I care? Oh yeah, I don’t.
The acting. OH the acting. well I can’t blame this actresses, given the fact that they’re working with dialogue on par with that of George Lucas… No wait, that’s not fair… George Lucas is at least tolerable. This script, which was penned by Snyder himself has to be the most laughable piece of masterbatory garbage this side of a sex shop. “If they catch us, we’re dead.” – “We’re already dead!” WAAAAHHHH!! Go cry emo girl.
Oh one good thing about the film, it does end at some point. Okay, I guess the visuals are stimulating for about five minutes, then you just want to bash your brains in with a copy of Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen because it’s the only thing that might keep you from totally losing for fricken mind!
Let’s get to the big picture of what this film is really about. Power and money, and Zack Snyder had all of it. This film is a perfect example how how a studio should not handle a director. So the guy made ’300′, big deal. Just because the kid did his homework and knows how to spell doesn’t mean you give him the keys to the Aston Martin and your credit card on a Friday night. They are letting him direct ‘Superman’! The godfather of all Superheroes! the king of all comics! After watching this film, I challenge anyone to not have deep worries about Snyder’s ability to tell a coherent story. Now Amy Adams being cast as Lois Lane is a step in the right direction… but let’s hope she doesn’t watch ‘Sucker Punch’.
In summation, ‘Sucker Punch’ is nothing more than a thirteen year old boy masturbating to anime hentai, zombie flicks, and a victoria secret catalogue wrapped in a studio logo and smothered in ripped off Lord of the Rings battle sequences.
After this film, I subsequently hated everything Zack Snyder has every done, and will ever do. All I kept thinking to myself is, “This guy is directing Superman.” After five seconds of this thought, it began to scare me. Let’s hope that Christopher Nolan keeps him on a short- VERY SHORT leash.
It’s official, the movie season has come early! With last week’s strong release of Johnny Depp’s animated comedy ‘Rango’ (not a great film, but it was okay), and a potentially strong weekend for Sony’s ‘Battle: Los Angeles’, it’s safe to say that the 2011 blockbuster season is officially here.
Take the leap to see the full review, I tried my best to avoid spoilers, but a few things could be considered as such, so, you have been warned, SPOILER ALERT for what follows!
‘Battle: Los Angeles’ is a strong film. Not an incredible film, but a very enjoyable one nonetheless. The film stars Aaron Eckhart as Staff Sargent Nantz, a broken man trying to get out of the Marines until he’s called in for one last mission… Save civilians from behind enemy lines during Earth’s first interstellar war. Think of the film like this: ‘Black Hawk Down’ meets ‘Independence Day’.
Let’s start with what the film lacks. Editing. Editing. Editing. At just about two hours, the film drags and feels very very VERY long. I remember a few instances in which i wanted to check my watch to see how much longer the film had left. The film could have easily lost about twenty or thirty minutes and still would have maintained a brisk pace and thrilling sense of adventure. With that said…..
This film is awesome. The visual effects are simply breathtaking and really add to the spectacle and worldly elements. The entire film, i kept thinking to myself, “They couldn’t possibly have shut down all these real locations just for one film, could they? Not on a $70 million budget?” While many locations are real and dressed so perfectly, many locations, like a thrilling scene on the 10 Freeway are recreated with startling precision. For one who lives in Los Angeles, this film really hits home, engulfing you, even including you in it’s storyline; begging the question, “Where would I be? What would I be doing?”
One thing i found very admirable, while also painfully annoying is that we never really get a good look at the aliens. We see them from a great distance, and usually down the barrel of an M4 scope. Granted in many alien films you never really see the creatures clearly, but with this film having such a unique execution of the genre, i was personally hoping for a glimpse at some unique alien monsters. But alas, we never really see them clearly for more than a moment. But what’s great about this is the fact it maintains the sense of wonder, awe and suspense.
Let’s discuss the acting. It’s good. A film like this doesn’t need Oscar caliber actors, though through Aaron Eckhart, it certainly gets one. The other cast members are forgettable, but they serve their purpose as order abiding Marines. My only complaint from the acting is one bad line delivered by one Michelle Rodriguez. Personally, I’m not her biggest fan, but her line is so poorly recited that I couldn’t help but issue a loud groan in the middle of a packed theatre.
In conclusion, the film is a unique portrayal of Alien invasion flicks. What it lacks in tight editing, and dialogue, it makes up for with amazing action sequences and heartfelt scenes of camaraderie and patriotism. ‘Battle: Los Angeles’ may be a flawed film, but it is a roller coaster of excitement that has certainly been a breath of fresh air and wonderful way to welcome the tent-pole movie season.
